talbotlucas.org: a word to the wise is sufficient

Just in case you think I'm way out in left field with the baboon article when I should be thinking of loftier legal matters, here's an excerpt from a New Yorker profile of Judge Posner entitled "The Bench Burner," written by Larissa MacFarquhar and published in the 10 December 2001 issue:

Posner is an ardent fan of monkeys, his instinctive attraction perhaps bolstered by his socio-biological sense that monkeys are basically humans with fewer affectations. A couple of years ago, he watched a nature program about baboons, and found them so delightful that he decided to call the zoo and adopt one....

One Sunday morning in the early fall, Posner and Charlene took their four-year-old grandson, Nathaniel, to the zoo. Nathaniel had an appointment in the early afternoon, so Posner was eager to get to the zoo first thing, in order not to be short of time. He allowed, however, rather too much time, and so even though he absent-mindedly drove past the entrance and quite a long way into town before he noticed, he, Charlene, and Nathaniel still arrived forty-five minutes before the zoo opened. It was raining hard, so they first sat in the car and then, when that got too depressing, huddled, shivering, under the eaves of the ticket booth until the gates were unlocked. It was not, truth be told, the first time that Posner had felt cold-shouldered by the zoo. When his baboon-adoption materials arrived in the mail, they had contained not a picture of his baboon but only a postcard of a generic baboon. Posner discovered to his dismay that he had not, in fact, adopted a particular baboon but, instead, had contributed to a general fund, which entitled him only to part of a baboon, in a kind of time-sharing arrangement. Upon learning this, he had felt infantilized and perhaps even a little deceived by the zoo, but then he put these feelings aside and made inquiries about adopting a whole animal....

When they left the monkey house, it was raining harder than ever. Still, having come all that way; Posner felt he should pay a visit to the baboons. The baboons were housed in a fenced-in area, in the center of which stood a large rock, pocked with shallow caves. Most were huddled inside the caves, away from the rain, but three baboons were sitting side by side on an exposed branch, perfectly still, enduring the weather in silence. Why? Posner mused, fascinated by the sight, which appeared to defy even the most minimal dictates of rationality. Did they like the rain? he wondered. They didn't look as if they liked it. Were they too stupid to move? Were they being punished in some way? Or were they, perhaps, conducting this bitter vigil in the service of some impenetrable simian stoicism? What if one of the stupid or criminal or stoical baboons turned out to be his baboon? Posner stood for a minute more, peering at the dripping, motionless trio on the branch, then turned away, baffled.

It's a great and highly readable profile (is that redundant?), and a rekeyed version of the complete article is available online.